Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you don't know.
Drill a one-inch diameter hole in your refrigerator door. This will allow you to check that the light goes off when the door is closed.
Avoid being wheel-clamped by jacking your car up, removing the wheels and locking them safely in the car until you return.
Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield wipers to "fast wipe" whenever you leave your car parked illegally.
Take your rubbish bin to the supermarket with you so that you can see which items you have recently run out of.
No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in duct tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.
Expensive hair gels are a con. Marmalade is a much cheaper alternative, but beware of bees in the summer.
Avoid cutting yourself while clumsily slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.